This version actually has all the scenes down on paper rather than relying on so much in my head, and I rearranged huge, huge huge chunks of the chronology and made a bunch of sense make sense.
My plan is to put this completely aside for two weeks and work on other stuff. At the end of two weeks, I will begin incorporating the reader feedback that I have received at that point along with another read-aloud of the draft. I figure that will take me a week or two. I will continue to incorporate feedback as it is received. At that point, I may do one more quick read-aloud, which would make the third full one, or else I'm going to figure the thing is ready for prime-time and send it to the agent.
Because I will be doing at least one, probably two, more oral read-through(s), I am less worried about sentence level stuff and more interested in questions of:
1) places where the chronology doesn't make sense
2) places where you don't see the world clearly enough
3) places where the narrative should be slowed down/sped up
4) places where you would like to see more of a character's (emotional) interior
5) places where you don't know what the heck is going on
6) places where the tone is inconsistent or jarring
This is planned as the first of three that spans the period of the election and the month afterward, so there are some minor plothooks that will grow in later volumes. Glyndia is an unresolved plot-thread, as is the election and its results. So are Mrs. Tiggy, the Beasts on the beach, and Elena the Photographer.
If you didn't get the mail but are interested in reading the book and think you can comment in that amount of turn-around time (3 weeks or so), please drop me a line!
It feels a little odd to be at this stage. I am going to catch up on my reading for ReaderCon - finished the Shadow Year (which I liked and reminded me some of the first part of McCammon's A Boy's Life, with some Straubian resonances thrown in) and City of Ashes, which is fun and very competent and very much in the BtVS tradition. I'm halfway through its sequel, plus somewhat into the Rhetorics of Fantasy book along with the Crowley book. Current bathroom reading is The Three Musketeers.
I'm going to spend the next couple of weeks write-a-thoning and finishing up a bunch of little assignments -- reading two novels, a couple of interviews, a Neb awards blog post, some SFWA Copyright Committee stuff, the rest of the ReaderCon writing, straightening out the Fantasy Magazine schedule and prepping some stuff for July, along with a larger project with Jeff VanderMeer.