"Psst," the toaster whispered one morning as she was extracting an English muffin. "Take me in the other room, we need to talk."
"Don't say anything, I don't want him to notice. Just pretend to go about your business and then say you're going to take me for repairs."
The English muffin was burnt black. She looked at it unhappily.
"Gee," she said. "I guess I'll have to take you in for repairs."